kumquat-may:

NO BUT GUYS JESUS WAS ONCE WALKING FOLLOWED BY HIS DISCIPLES AND HE SAW A FIG TREE AND WENT OVER TO IT EXPECTING FRUIT BUT IT WASNT THE SEASON FOR FIGS SO HE CURSED THE TREE SO THAT IT MAY NEVER GROW FRUIT AGAIN

BASICALLY A TREE WAS DOING ITS NATURAL THING AND JESUS WAS SAD BECAUSE HE DIDNT GET ANY FIGS SO HE SAID “LOL FUCK U”

therorasaurus:

so my dad’s friend was bartending and saw a guy put something in a girl’s drink so while the guy turned around he switched their drinks and watched the guy roofie himself. 

at a pool party

vayena:

"hey bukowski no offense but why dont you take your shirt off in the pool"
"why do we run from the rain but soak in tubs full of water"
"aight take it easy man"

applevevo:

listening to a sad song that has a nice beat

image

wizcoylifa:

dear coca cola company,

i drank some of your POWERADE drink and im still weak as fuck when will the power begin to kick in? please reply soon, i just sent a mass text to my entire school saying i would beat up the football team this friday

antiteen:

The teacher said ‘hit the lights’ and this kid punched the light switch and broke it

People run from rain but
sit
in bathtubs full of
water.

Charles Bukowski (via bittersweetsongs)

Wow bukowski so profound do you also bathe fully clothed you dickhead. “Oohh isn’t it funny that a person will eat when they’re hungry but will duck if you throw an apple at their face”

(via coolestpriest)